We can take a can of paint, re-coat a rusted chair
making it beautiful, almost new again
but if the rust and old loose paint wasn’t cleared away
it’s just a matter of time until chips and rust resurface
a painful blemish on our new perfection
Just like anger! If we don’t deal with the resentment
if we just move on, deal with the present, keep it clean
avoiding the real bone of contention underneath
the poison, the rot, the untreated decay patiently
waits for the next bump to bring it back to the surface
How do we balance moving on, not letting yesterday ruin today
with clearing away the root of the problem? Surely the hardest
part of the Serenity Prayer; dealing with past problems,
and changing, requires one foot in the past. It’s not the same
as setting troubles behind and then joining them there
Do we just accept the things we cannot change? Spray
on a new can of ‘just for today, it will be ok’? Do we
take up the fight and change the circumstances?
Deal with the unpleasantness of confrontation
risking clearing our resentment, but losing the other person
Where do we gain the wisdom to know the difference?
How do we set aside the emotions to not react?
As with most things, it’s all in the prep work. Take
the wire brush of reason, bounce thoughts off others
and then, choose the next right thing
Our life unfolds before us
memories gathered, moments combined
taking our eyes off the present to view our past
Stories, dramas, decisions…
choices paving the way to who we have become
Growing and learning
experiences accrued along the way
loves, loses, tributes or tumbles
those we embrace or those we avoid
even those we have excommunicated
all hold a place, leave a mark, on who we are
Separated and viewed singularly
like pages in a book
all these small pieces of us…
pieces flowing into one another
our decisions and actions of today
shape the choices of tomorrow
As we look back through the chapters
viewing the story of our life
fold down the pages of successes and joys
save the “what if’s” for the positive impacts
look at the impressions we had on others
What if we were not there to change those lives?
These are the things that matter!
these are the paths we want to keep marked
these are the images to keep alive
the parts of us we want to always share
the true making of a best seller!
For just a few moments during the holiday season,
with all the festivities and celebrations,
I can’t help but reflect…
Some life changing moments, although they pass by
so swiftly, impact us deeply throughout our life.
Even after decades, a lifetime ago, I can’t help
but wonder… how would things be different?
How many lives changed, but for the turn of a wheel?
One stupid moment in the name of fun. A young life
flung to the side, the impact crushing so many dreams.
Avoidance, anger, or alcoholic amnesia!
We each dealt in our own ways. Time healed,
scabs form and fall away. Others can’t help
but pick at the past, ripping sores open again
and again, causing a lifetime of pain and scars!
Life goes on whether we like it or not.
Move on with it… or a part of us dies, locked
away in the shadow of yesterdays. Emotions stuffed
deep, never seeing the light of day, constantly
feeling on the emotional level of when walled away.
Sitting and pondering another second or two
A single flower and prayer placed in remembrance.
Stopping time just to reminisce…
A giant smile, a gleam in the eye,
the bounce full of youthful excitement.
All the laughs and lies and loves at sixteen
briefly brought back to life this time of year.
The sadness of loss, a splintering of friends,
a long ago life casts a temporary shadow…
shaped by the bright lights of the holiday season.